Foreplay for Valentine's Day

It is a week until that day where women are building up resentment that their special guy won’t remember or that he will stop by the local supermarket for flowers because the women in his office have asked him what he’s prepared for you.

Yikes! What is the pressure all about?

If your partner treats you lovingly all year long why make this day so important? If your partner treats you poorly what difference is there that you receive a card and a fancy dinner?

I am not minimizing the importance of ritual and celebration. It is the emphasis that seems overblown.

There is also the materialistic aspect. I notice that women in particular ask other women what they received. Comparison and competition does not belong in our evaluation of our worth.

In the Five Love Languages the author suggests that you give your partner what they want rather than something you want them to have. You don’t give what is easy but rather what takes effort. Some people value gifts, others acts of service.

Some value spending time together and others words of affirmation. It will make your special person feel you treasure them by asking what it is that is most meaningful to them.

We can call this the 7 Days of Valentine’s if each day you give what they value. Being understood is very sexy.

#couples #holidays #marriage #samesex #relationships